Maths

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read:"Dear wife, You must realize that you are 54 years old and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter,
I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight. - Your Husband"When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that read as follows: "Dear Husband. You too are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this,
I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Don't wait up."

Hot And Cold

AN ELDERLY MARRIED COUPLE SCHEDULED THEIR ANNUAL MEDICAL EXAMINATION ON THE SAME DAY SO THEY COULD TRAVEL TOGETHER. AFTER THE EXAMINATION, THE DOCTOR THEN SAID TO THE ELDERLY MAN; "YOU APPEAR TO BE IN GOOD HEALTH. DO YOU HAVE ANY MEDICAL CONCERNS THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO DISCUSS WITH ME?" "IN FACT, I DO ", SAID THE MAN. "AFTER I HAVE SEX WITH MY WIFE FOR THE FIRST TIME, I AM USUALLY HOT AND SWEATY. AND THEN, AFTER HAVING SEX WITH MY WIFE THE SECOND TIME, I AM USUALLY COLD AND CHILLY." "THIS IS VERY INTERESTING ", REPLIED THE DOCTOR. "LET ME DO SOME RESEARCH AND GET BACK TO YOU." AFTER EXAMINING THE ELDERLY LADY, THE DOCTOR SAID: "EVERYTHING APPEARS TO BE FINE. DO YOU HAVE ANY MEDICAL CONCERNS THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO DISCUSS WITH ME?" THE LADY REPLIED THAT SHE HAD NO QUESTIONS NOR CONCERNS. THE DOCTOR THEN ASKED; "YOUR HUSBAND HAD AN UNUSUAL CONCERN. HE CLAIMS THAT HE IS USUALLY HOT AND SWEATY AFTER HAVING SEX THE FIRST TIME WITH YOU AND THEN COLD AND CHILLY AFTER THE SECOND TIME. DO YOU KNOW WHY?" "OH THAT OLD COOT!" SHE REPLIED. "THAT'S BECAUSE THE FIRST TIME IS USUALLY IN JULY AND THE SECOND TIME IS USUALLY IN DECEMBER!"